I've just been told this morning by someone that I THOUGHT loved me that I'm a user, that I neglect my children & that their not suprised at me being attacked by my son because "thats the way I treat people".
I guess that told me I because I thought I was someone who helped her friends or anyone else for that matter whenever they needed or wanted it. I also buy presents for people I know because I think they might like it instead of because it's a birthday or something like that, I support my husband because the finances are terrible, as for neglecting the children I'm the first one to admit I'm not a perfect mother but then who is, I have my dominant hand in plaster but apparently I'm still supposed to do everything as long as knowone helps me because that would be using them.
And as for being attacked because thats the way I treat people I dont hit people or threaten them with violence so figure that one out.
But maybe their right maybe I am a crap mother who uses everyone & deserves what she gets.
I found out yesterday that Danny had lied to me for the last 2 months about his course. I talked to him at lengh & he apologised & swore he would try harder & not lie. Then at Daves party while I was out the front Danny was in the back garden actually bragging to my friends at how proud he was for managing to lie to me for the last two months. I am so damn angry I cant describe it.
I've told him not to come back till he can apologise & respect me.
Hi Wombat I'm not sure if my e.mail is going out. I'd love to lush with you . Just let me know what time to meet u.
Hope your feeling better after groping old woman in the market. No need to use the excuse that she fell into your arm's though. LOL
Love you loads. C U 2morrow
Today I broke my little toe & then on the way home from the casualty department I waled into an open window frame & spent another 6 hours in casualty.
Give us a ring MHW. I miss you. Starting to think I've upset you.
Dave got caught by a speed camera on Sunday, crashed the car on Monday, Today we got told that Ashton has aspects of Neuro Fibromyalgia, a rare form of epilepsy & asd.
Whats going to go wrong next?
Despite Dave being loving & supportive I feel very alone.
11years ago today I had a perfect tiny little boy who I called Patrick but he died 2day's later, now I feel like I'm the only one left that cares. I'm on my own with 3 kid's today & my arm's are still aching for him, I dont wantt to go to the cemetry with no support there for me but I dont want to not go. I miss him so much & the pain is still almost as bad as the day he was taken from me. Having had more children didnt take that pain away. If anyone reads this just think about him for a minute, just so his life wasnt for nothing.
I had a big horrible shock tonight with my daughter & tommorow is just going to be shear total utter hell. Desperately seeking MHW. Needing serious hugs & reasurance.
I went to see a specialist tonight because I've been ill since May, he told me it was stress & depression, I wasnt stressed or depressed or stressed till he told me I was. I hate doctors sometimes. Ok, most of the time.
Well, we got up at 4 this morning, got a 6.15 coach to London, got very confused over where we were supposed to be do we have an answer? no. Do we have more questions? Yes.
They have rechecked little C's MRI scan & found that part of it, an anterior something or other is to small. Result of the finding? He need's more test's. So in about 6mnths we may or may not get a diagnosis & with that a prognosis.
The only thing they confirmed was that he is developmentally 3 - 4 mnths, since he is 8mnth's thats half what he should be.
David's grandpa is gravely ill now, David is going to see him for the last time on Sunday, he only has weeks left, like anything in our lives goes right..
I feel very very lonely
I just had a phone call off the social worker & he finally admitted that they had got the dates wrong when they accused us of attempting to deceive them, the hospital secretary confirmed that I was in hospital when I said I was. I've even managed to get him to agree to an apology in writing. They are still trying to stop us taking him to see Dr Flynn in Dublin, even though when I asked if one of his children went blind suddenly would he keep looking till he found out why or just go home & accept it he said he would keep looking. Good enough for him apparently but not for us. I told him that if needs be we would be prepared to go to court for permission to take Christopher to Dublin. Now he say's we can discuss it on Thursday when he comes out to see us.